Everybody come take my hand
We'll walk this road together, through the storm
Whatever weather, cold or warm
Just let you know that, you're not alone
Holla if you feel that you've been down the same road
So starting today, I'm breaking out of this cage
I'm standing up, Imma face my demons
I'm manning up, Imma hold my ground
I've had enough, now I'm so fed up
Time to put my life back together right now"
Not afraid - Eminem
So much can change in so little time. One decision can change your life forever. One wrong move can change the way people see you. One word can make someone hate you. One sentence can break someone's trust forever. It is all so fragile. It takes so long to like people, to trust people yet it all can break down so quickly. Why is that? Why is it that you can't trust someone straight away, they have to earn your trust? Yet you can be betrayed in seconds and it will never be the same again. Why can't people forgive other people? Why can't people move on?
I hate that it took me so long to become who I am today. I hate that I had to do so many wrong things, lose so many people before I could realise all of this. I hate that I have lost people who I will never be able to get back. I hate knowing that I am still very likely to mess things up and have to go back to square one.
I like the person I am now. I've never liked who I used to be. Who I have been for the last 6 years. I am back to being me. I am back to knowing what I want and actually going out there and trying to get it. Things aren't going as planned, it isn't as easy as I thought it would be, yet I am getting through it all and it feels good. I feel like I am getting somewhere, even if it takes me a long time.
I haven't been on my own in so long. I forgot who I was. I got lost between other people. And knowing that I can still be myself and be happy is great. I am back to liking just hanging out with me. It took so much for me to get here but now everything is going ok. I will be ok. Everything will turn out just fine. It feels awesome.
People change everyday. And to know how much I've changed in the last 6 years and to know that I have had great people around me to help me get here is amazing.
I like me now.
1 comment:
If you had a like button I would like this post. It's so true, it really does take a long time to build up trust and then BAM it's gone. I've forgotten who I was by myself too. But I am by myself and you know what? That's okay. We'll be fine Vero :)
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